I’ve been addicted to sugar ever since I can remember. My body has been communicating it’s difficulties in handling this sweet tooth for over 10 years now. At times I’ve listened better than others, but usually only when my physical discomfort is close to unbearable. Adjustments in my eating habits and diet, including decreasing my processed foods and sugars began in 1998. Soon after, I ended up in the hospital with a burst appendix that had turned gangrene.
Since the Master Cleanse diet of lemon juice, maple syrup and cayenne pepper came into my awareness, it felt like something to consider trying. This liquid diet was originally promoted by Stanley Burroughs in his book The Master Cleanser. After 36 years of eating pretty much whatever I want, allergies, a funky thing going on with one of my toenails, hypoglycemia, an extended cold and a 10+ year battle with candida, I sense it’s time to give my insides a nice big flush. And flush I have been – so much I’m concerned my toilet handle may fall off. As with all things, my first experience with a liquid diet should be interesting to witness.
In the journey to know myself, the psychological aspects of this 10 day commitment are at the forefront of my awareness. The negative mental chatter didn’t waste any time. Within the first few sips of last nights pre-cleanse saline flush, it whispered “I can’t do this. There’s no way I can drink all of this salt water.”
Somehow I drank last night’s saline, and manged to drink another 32 ounces of water with 2 teaspoons of sea salt this morning. The experience reminded me of a struggle around age 13 of overcoming a powerful undertow off the Carolina coast. My energy is actually pretty good today and I like the flavor of the lemonade. After an afternoon nap, I’m ravenous and wondering how this simple solution is going to quell my pangs. Amazingly, it did. Start weight: 129.8lbs.
Awoke with a metallic taste in my mouth. My tongue is beginning to get coated with a white paste that won’t brush off – a sign of the release of toxins. I’m feeling quite vibrant and alive this morning and early afternoon taking care of the home space. Renee came over in the mid afternoon. She’s an exceptional friend who started the cleanse along with me. We filled the rest of the day with a walk and trips to the grocery for more supplies. The time inside Trader Joes was absolutely torturous. Everything looked amazing – especially the avocados. My cravings consist of fresh vegetables over green lentils with Braggs and potato chips. Interestingly I was not tempted by the woman offering samples of a rich chocolate dessert.
After the trip to the grocery, I crashed hard in response to waiting too long before consuming more lemonade. My head started to throb, and my muscles felt like a bowl of spaghetti. To compound this torture, my water intake was minimal. Interesting that I choose not to bring water with me today, when I rarely leave the house without it. My lethargy turned into giddiness – most likely due to the company of Renee. After downing lemonade and water, my headache began to subside along with an increase of energy. Dropping into the sadist role, I continue my evening at Renee’s house collaborating on an upcoming movement playshop scheduled for 10/31 instead of resting. My head to split open within a couple of hours and found myself at home grateful for such a laid-back dog that will quickly relieve herself off-leash in the back. A personalized frequency from the Center for Inner Knowing lulled me into la la land.
Upon waking my head is pounding again and my mouth taste putrid. I would love nothing more than to crawl back in bed, but I have a commitment to care for 9month old twins this week! My headache subsided after ingesting the lemonade which I did not particularly enjoy. My body pain is intense today, so I’m praying to the Universe for a smooth day. Utilizing kinesiology (muscle testing) my system indicates Valor essential oil blend and Walnut flower essence are beneficial for me today.
The twins are napping upon my arrival, and I am very grateful for their relaxed mood upon waking and throughout the day. My body pain continues, with simple yoga providing a bit of relief. There was a bit of food envy for cheese and bananas as I prepared their snack. As I’m writing this a desire for a tuna melt comes over me followed by instant salivation. Must focus…after leaving the twins I drove over to the Variety Playhouse to pick up tixs for this Friday’s Medeski Martin & Wood show and realize they have an unusually early start time of 8:30pm. So much for a nap before! The unsupported mental chatter picks up again saying there’s no way I’ll have energy to enjoy and make it through the show, much less teach a 9am Nia class on Saturday morning.
By 6:30p, I’m totally wiped and thankful that I choose to place my dog at day care. After my last glass of lemonade for the day, I’m down for a nap alongside my furbabies. Refreshed upon waking and still experiencing body pain it’s time for and Epsom salt & aromatherapy bath in nurturing completion of my day.
Last night’s bath was heavenly – I used orange essential oil to help ease muscle discomfort along with lavender and chamomile for their relaxing properties. Using kinesiology, my body indicated it would benefit from Rosewood essential oil – calming and harmonizing for both the mood and the body as well as providing gentle relief for fatigued muscles. The sound therapy I utilized during my bath was Margaret Lembo’s Crystal Singing Bowl Meditation. Parts of the recording are lower quality and Margaret has a New Jersey accent to roll with, so on a scale from 1-5, I give it a 3. Using healing frequencies while soaking in the tub is something I utilize frequently due to the magnification of the sound waves through the water.
This morning I woke joyfully without muscle pain, yet feeling quite groggy. In preparation for my day, the quiet and lack of mental chatter came to my awareness. During the morning walk with RakSita (the amazingly sweet and exceptional hound), the vibration of the neighborhood plants, their colors and the patterns they made were strikingly beautiful. A gardenia came home with me to be enjoyed on the altar.
I felt pretty spacey through until mid morning and also noted my tongue’s white coating had increased. I’ve found myself fantasizing about food a couple of times – angel hair pasta and rich marinara with artichoke hearts. My energy level and clarity increased throughout the day while my mind remained pleasantly light on the negative and judgmental chatter. Today’s overall tone has been about being – nothing more and nothing less, which has felt very calming and loving to the self.
It’s a bit of a struggle to get out of bed today, and sleep has seduced me into hitting snooze repeatedly. Overall, my energy level through the day is good and brings encouragement in my ability to teach a Nia class tomorrow night.
The toxic tongue coating seems to be increasing along with a resurgence of a metallic taste. The lemonades have included less maple syrup the past couple of days – imagine that a sugar addict opting for less. On day 3 the syrup was repulsive to me (when on day 1 and 2 I was licking the spoon), but that sensation has passed.
Again there is more calm and quiet in my head than usual. Although the begins to increase at chatter at the end of the day around work, and follow-through, creating pressure around a commitment to start a long-term position starting Monday. This cleanse and situation has illuminated my resistance to pledging my energy to myself and the fear that comes up in doing so with others.
Although it’s not my main intent, I have been enjoying the weight loss resulting from the cleanse process. Getting into a pair of pants that have been stagnating in the dresser felt rewarding along with witnessing my stomach coming close to being totally flat – something I’m confident will happen by the end with all this old waste being removed from my colon. There’s no scale at my house, so weigh-in won’t happen again until the next time at Renee’s.
Desire for food and eating is pretty strong. I don’t own a TV, but when I partake in my meals at home, it’s usually watching Netflix instant view. In choosing tonight’s hour long Showtime episode, I noticed my mouth watering and a strong craving for nachos.
Tonight’s bath included a delicious combination of orange, rosewood, tea tree and juniper berry essential oils. The healing sound meditation a vocalization of the vowel sounds of Kimba Arem and Dr. Andrew Weil – Self-Healing with Sound and Music. If you are not familiar with Kimba Arem, she is amazing. I highly recommend her works of frequency art. Tom Kenyon’s Soma followed up the meditation, cocooning me within the mysteries of the night.
Today has been the most challenging for me on the emotional realm. The book The Complete Master Cleanse by Tom Woloshyn indicates this part of the cleanse comes up for many people around this time. I’ve been unable to locate the explanation within the book as to why at this time and frankly, I don’t have the patience right now. Impatience, anger, fear are the main low vibration emotions I’ve experienced today. My morning started off with a very real and disturbing dream and it’s taken a lot of energy to keep from feeding the unpleasantness that has come up around it today. I keep praying to the Divine to help me release this old crap (literally) and on all realms.
My physical energy has been quite good. Teaching tonight’s Nia class was no problem. This gives me encouragement about being fully present and able to enjoy tomorrow nights MMW show at the Variety and around the commitment I just made to provide loving support to the students enrolled in the Singles Course at the Center for Inner Knowing this weekend. This course was a really beautiful and beneficial experience as a student – enabling me to deepen my connection to myself and recognize patterns in romantic relationships. I highly recommend it and all the courses at the Center for Inner Knowing. So I’m excited about the next few days!
Today I awoke feeling very vibrant and alive. The juicy plumb I cut up for the twins radiated an amazing energy and light. It was actually quite spectacular. Even with that, there was no urge to eat or hunger. “You’ll be eating soon enough” was my internal message. The day rolled and rained on until about 3p when my head started hurting.
Come evening, the headache worsened so much I considered ditching the concert. My answer was to push through the pain and go anyway. The intensity of the headache was enhanced by particular notes on the keyboard that John Medeski struck multiple times – like breaking glass in my skull. The show was quite good – they are so amazingly talented. There were a few times at the end when I was inspired to really throw down and dance fully, but that wasn’t a disappointment or surprise.
The days schedule is totally full with practicing kinesiology at the Center for Inner Knowing during the Singles Course, taking care of the animals, then babysitting for an 18month and 3.5 year old. My energy level remains really good, and even though there’s a plethora of amazing food surrounding me, there are no urges to eat. The 3.5 year old had a complete melt down upon bedtime which was extremely unpleasant – crying endlessly and refusing to communicate what the upset was about.
Again the day is demanding a good deal of energy as I’m facilitating kinesiology practice sessions during the Singles Course. The lemonade is extremely difficult to take today. Come early afternoon my gag reflexes kicked in as I forced another serving down. My body had been communicating it’s displeasure all day – it felt like it was collapsing into itself and having difficulties standing still without support and screaming for the healthy food cooked with love from Belly. In reading my body and overall energy, a few friends suggested I partake in some sustenance at different times throughout the day. My reactive reply was “No” and in my mind the reply was “I have to do this no matter what.” As my body and emotions started crashing out I thought about the “have to” and the reason why I started this cleanse – to honor my body. It was clearly unhappy myself and others. A few hours later I asked my kinesiology mentor to test if it was in the highest and best good for me to come off the cleanse and the answer was “yes.” Interesting that I felt I needed someone else to validate what I already knew.
Integration – Day 1
The mental chatter still continues about “quitting a day early” but the reality is, my body was done. It’s too early to say how I’ve physically benefited from the Cleanse. I can say the candida based skin irritations are very active and my sweet tooth hasn’t gone anywhere. It probably would have taken more than 10 days to fully clear out of my system, so this isn’t a tactic I’d use to gain balance in that arena again. Now I will need to find an alternative solution as my symptoms are very much activated. The funkiness under my toenail seems to be clearing up. My mouth continues to feel very gross and my white-coated tongue is making the experience of food less than spectacular. My stomach is flat and I don’t know how much weight I’ve lost yet, but my usual clothes are too baggy. Today’s energy has been a bit low – possibly because of my dog waking me up several times due to the thunderstorms last night.
It’s been about six days since I came off the cleanse. All and all, I can’t say that I’ve noticed any major physical benefits. To be fair, you are technically supposed to stay on it a minimum of ten days and until your tongue turns pink and the white toxic film has cleared. My body started shutting down before that happened. It was amazing to still be passing waste through my colon after nine days of no solid food and a diet without poultry or meat for over ten years. I did not pass any mucous, which I was hoping for considering a re-occurring sinus drip and allergies spanning 20+ years. My craving for sugar is definitely alive and well. To balance out the candida that flared up intensely during the cleanse, I’m drinking apple cider vinegar to alkalize the blood and a pau d’arco, echinacea, wormwood tincture. There is no strong pull for me to try this cleanse again, that being said, I have no regrets around trying it. I learned a lot about believing in myself and being able to sustain through challenges that I would have automatically discounted as “impossible” in the past. I was also reminded about the innate wisdom of the body and to listen to it when there’s a difference/opposition between the body and the mind. Thank you kinesiology!